2014 Annus Horribilis – v – 2015 Hope!

With Christmas only a day away, and the New Year fast approaching, I wasn’t really sure what I was going to write about today. But then I remembered back in 1982 when our Queen Elizabeth gave her annual  Christmas speech, she spoke of that being her  ‘annus horribilis’ (or roughly translated horrible year.) It’s so hard to believe that yet another Christmas is up on us, and another years journey has taken place in all our lives. For many people tomorrow will just be another day. Although this year I don’t feel ‘Christmassy’ I am looking forward to spending some special quality time with my family.

In some ways at some point in our lives we all have had one of those annus horribilis. I think that for me on a personal level throughout 2014 this has been one of my worst years ever, so realistically this has been my own ‘horrible year’. And yet despite that I have come back from the brink on a mental and physical level fighting it, defying the odds and feeling somewhat stronger in my mind than ever before, or even thought I ever could be.

In April  I was again made redundant from my job, the second time in less than 18 months, and was out of work for nearly 3 months, this in itself challenged me.  But some good did follow on from that and I landed myself a temporary contract of employment with a massive global food company. I finished that contract on Nov 7th, alas no permanent job at the end of it.  Three days later, I was, for the second time in just a little over a  a week rushed into hospital again, this time for emergency surgery. I  am now happy to say I am well recovered from these last 6 weeks from said  surgery which was  for a large and painful perineal abscess and blood poisoning.  In Oct my cousin passed away after a short illness, and then the same month even more dreadful news about my Aunt at 86 having breast cancer. Fortunately for my Aunt and the rest of the family the news following her lumpectomy was better than we had hoped, how ever she still has a long way to go to fight this awful disease, but we are all hoping she has the strength and determination in her to beat it, in January she will start her radiotherapy treatment. Last month I also lost  my little furry companion of the last 9 years, dear little Sootykins, whose name I used to pen my blog. With all this going on this last few months, over this past week I have had the opportunity to reflect on the past year and wonder what would have happened if I hadn’t tried to  remain so positive about not only the present but also the  future. There is a lot to be said for positivity.

Throughout this year, especially these past 3 months, in all honesty I would have normally crawled away into my corner and cowered away from everyone and everything, and wouldn’t have cared if I never resurfaced again. And yet some of these changes in my life this past year has made me become in some ways more positive about my future, it has made me realize I have been challenging myself far more than I have for many years. I have taken to learning more, especially about the job I did within Mondelez. I have challenged myself with the passion I have for my  photography, I have met many new and incredible people and made some close friendships with some of them. All of this has made me feel a little more confident about myself, and my future, and my ability to press on forward into 2015. In addition to all this come next April I will have achieved the goal of reaching my 50th birthday. In a nutshell, with all the bad stuff going on, it means some good stuff has come out of it all.

With this all being said I started to wonder why I feel so differently about this year. Ok, so it’s been a really bad year for myself and my family, but then, that is nothing new.  Yes, I am sure the medication for my depression has helped me stay on top, but there is also something else that has been nagging me at the back of my mind in recent weeks as to why it is I have coped better, why it is I have managed to stay positive throughout these past few months. I’ve come to the conclusion it’s that little thing called HOPE.


As You Travel Through Life
Poet Unknown

As you travel through life there are always those times
When decisions just have to be made,
When the choices are hard, and solutions seem scarce,
And the rain seems to soak your parade.

There are some situations where all you can do
Is simply let go and move on,
Gather your courage and choose a direction
That carries you toward a new dawn.

So pack up your troubles and take a step forward –
The process of change can be tough,
But think about all the excitement ahead

There might be adventures you never imagined
Just waiting around the next bend,
And wishes and dreams just about to come true
In ways you can’t yet comprehend!

Perhaps you’ll find friendships
that spring from new things
As you challenge your status quo,
And learn there are so many options in life,

Perhaps you’ll go places you never expected
And see things that you’ve never seen,
Or travel to fabulous, faraway worlds
And wonderful spots in between!

Perhaps you’ll find warmth and affection and caring
And somebody special who’s there
To help you stay cantered and listen with interest
To stories and feelings you share.

Perhaps you’ll find comfort in knowing your friends
Are supportive of all that you do,
And believe that whatever decisions you make,
They’ll be the right choices for you.

So keep putting one foot in front of the other,
And taking your life day by day…
There’s a brighter tomorrow that’s just down the road –
Don’t look back! You’re not going that way!

Wishing all my followers  a Merry Christmas, and a Happy,  Healthy, Hopeful New Year in 2015.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s